For the whole month of June, El, Nema, and I lived at the Cogan's house in East Lansing while they were at summer project. It was such a blessing hanging out with our friends, going to bible study, attending URC, volunteering at Shared Pregs, and just being in a place that we loved. We are now back in North Branch and have been enjoying the fourth of July activities.
I loved living in East Lansing again. It was the town that Elliott and I would have lived in if his cancer had not reoccurred. In my mind, I thought living in Lansing might make life easier. I could hang out with friends when I was having a bad day, and Elliott and I could really be responsible for ourselves. Lansing was easier in some ways. I would go cry in the arms of friends, instead of waiting weeks and weeks to see them. The only bad thing was once I left to go see people, Elliott would be alone. Being alone is hard especially if you don't feel good to begin with. I didn't want Elliott to feel lonely or bad, so I didn't hang out with people a much as I thought I would. Back in North Branch, when I leave to go see friends El is alone but his parents live right across the street, so he is never really alone.
We also started to miss all the physical support that we got at home. If I did not not want to make dinner, I could always go to my in laws, and they would feed us. In Lansing though, if I didn't want to make dinner I still had to go out somewhere and pick it up. I really missed all the support we got from family.
I guess no matter where you live there is never just flowers and butterflies. A place does not just make your problems go away, and maybe I had this romantic notion that living in Lansing would make the side effects or problems of cancer disappear. Well it doesn't. There is no perfect place to live on this earth. The only perfect place with no tears and hurt is heaven, and this makes me yearn for heaven even more.
But as of now we are back in our house. I forgot how much I love the lake in the summer time. We have been home a week and it has been so relaxing and fun. Last summer, I did not swim at all in the lake, and this summer I have swam four times. Oh, I do love North Branch! You just need to be reminded by getting away every once and a while.
